DERPS Dungeon Actual Play
solo dungeon crawling with DERPS Dungeons
2025-10-13
Contents
About
This is a playthrough of DERPS with DERPS Dungeon Fantasy options.
Getting Started
Procedure
- Make a couple of derps.
- Download a dungeon from https://donjon.bin.sh/fantasy/dungeon/
- ADVENTURE
Kino is an hunter of aberrations and abominations. She has a hawk named David.
- Name: Kino
- Strength:
5434 - Victory Points: 0
- Ancestry: Human / Human
- Profession: Ranger Occultist. +2 to tracking, trapping, nature, and survival rolls. +1 to hit with ranged weapons. Animal companion. +2 to monster lore, occult/esoteric lore, myths, research and library rolls.
- Weapon: Bow and arrow (+1 to hit, 2 damage)
- Armor: Studded Leather. +1 Defense
- Equipment: Iron Pot, Iron Spikes, Bedroll
- Spell Levels: 2/2
- Spell: Bend Fate
Chaax Kri is small and mighty.
- Name: Chaax Kri
- Strength:
65 - Victory Points: 3
- Ancestry: Hobblit / Dwarf. +2 speed, +2 poison resistance
- Profession: Warrior Thief. +1 to hit with melee weapons, +1 to sneaking and thieving. +2 to all perception and detection.
- Weapon: Short sword (2 damage)
- Armor: Padded Leather (+1) Helmet (+1)
- Equipment: Hammer, Mule, Magnifying Glass
The Secret Undercrypt of the Demon Duke
Kino and Chaax Kri arrive at the entrance to the crypt. Their goal, make it to the center of the crypt and steal the demon lord’s treasure hoard.

Entrance
Description: 3 stuck doors. Someone has scrawled “Beware the basilisk” on the east wall, and a metallic odor fills the room 2 x 1st Level Warrior Orc. Treasure: 140 gp
First, we’ll have to get into the room. The door ahead is stuck.
Chaax Kri confidently approaches the wooden door and heaves. d10 (5) + 5 = 10 vs. Difficulty level 1 = d10 (5) + 1 = 6. The rusty hinges groan loudly as he pries the door open, alerting the room’s occupants to their arrival.
Two orcs (Str 3) get the drop on our heroes and take a swing at Chaax Kri as he opens the door. They each are wielding a club (+1 to hit, 1 damage). 10 + 3 + 1 = 14, 5 + 3 + 1 = 9 vs 5 + 5 + 2 = 12, 7 + 5 + 2 = 14. The first attack hits and the second misses. He takes 1 damage. Current Str = 4.
Regular combat commences. Kino backs up to line up a shot on the orcs. Nobody else moves.
Chaax Kri thrusts his sword at the first orc, the one who just clubbed him. 9 + 5 + 1 = 15 vs 4 + 3 = 7. The orc takes 2 damage to Str, reducing it to 1, rendering it unconscious.
Kino fires at the remaining orc. 10 (d10) + 3 (str) + 1 (ranger) + 1 (bow) - 1 (range) = 14 vs 8 + 3 = 11. The 2nd orc drops unconscious.
Chaax Kri rubs his ribs where he just got clubbed and he and Kino head into the room.
Total treasure: 140gp
Two doors lie ahead. Chaax listens at both of them, doesn’t hear anything. Flips a coin: south it is. 14 vs 7, Chaax Kri quietly unsticks the door and opens it up revealing a corridor up ahead.
They pass two closed doors as they explore the hall. They find a stairs leading down to lower in the dungeon, but decide to ignore them for now. The crypt’s heart is on this level for sure. The hall abruptly dead-ends, and several adventurer corpses are scattered along the corridor where it ends.
Suspicious.
The warrior-thief looks around. 10 + 5 + 2 = 17 vs 1 + 3 = 4. He finds a door behind the pile of bodies concealed behind a statue of severe looking man grasping a chalice delicately between his fingers.
He looks at Kino and raises his eyebrows, questioning her. She shrugs and nocks her bow. He nods and opens the door.
The room is empty.
Traps
Backtracking, they pass through an archway and find another empty, medium-sized room.
Chaax Kri tries the other door in this room and finds it locked.
They backtrack further to some of the first closed doors they found and find one unlocked.
8 + 5 + 2 = 15 vs 9 + 5 = 14. They step into the room, Chaax Kri in the lead, clutching his sword, and Kino trailing behind him, her bow loaded and ready, pointed to the ground.
Chaax stops just in time, noticing a net trap. Kino steps forward to disable the trap (10 + 3 + 2 = 15 vs 8 + 5 = 13) and does so with no trouble.
An archway leads south into a room featuring a large iron door. Chaax checks it out and finds it stuck. (10 vs 7) The iron plate starts to heat up with alarming speed, threatening to sear his flesh and burn it off! Chaax draws his hand back just in time. Kino attempts to disable the trap (11 vs 6) and is able to disconnect the heating element.
The door swings open silently.
Through a corridor, they enter a small room. A lifeless mud golem in the corner lurches to life and staggers toward them!
Chaax Kri rushes forward to meet the homunculus, (7 vs 9) swings his sword but the creature bats the blow away with one hand and brings the second down like a club (11 vs 16) but Chaax counter perries. Kino shoots an arrow into the fracas (9 vs 8) and strikes the creature (Str 5 -> Str 3). Chaax swings again (7 vs 7) and there is a mighty clench as the edge of the blade gets stuck in the thing’s arm. The homunculus tries again to batter the hoblin-dwarf (10 vs 16) but Chaax Kri again ducks out of the way. The two wrestle as Kino fires another shot! (6 vs 12) The arrow goes wild. (6 vs 11) Chaax struggles to get his blade freed (14 vs 10) and the monster kicks out striking him in the knee (Str 5 -> Str 4). Kino desperately flies another arrow (5 vs 4) and it thuds into the monster’s chest with a sound like striking mud. (Str 3 -> Str 2) The homunculus falters, stumbles, and falls to the ground.
Chaax likewise collapses to the ground exhausted from the struggle. He takes a minute to catch his breath, and finally wrenches his blade free of the now lifeless pile of mud.
Total treasure: 210gp
I have been forgetting to award Victory Points! 2 points to Chaax Kri and Kino each. Not enough to do anything with yet. But Kino can at least level up after one more victory.
Shrieker

The pair venture south (14 vs 8) disarming a spear trap along the way and find themselves in a remarkable room with a stair that ascends to a catwalk hanging between the east and west walls, and several pieces of blood-soaked clothing scattered throughout the room.
Through an archway to the south, a faded and torn tapestry hangs from the east wall, and a cube of solid stone stands in the south-east corner of the room.
There is a shrieker here.
Rolled a 1 for the Shrieker, for 3 strength. This seems a little weak for a boss fight. So I’m going to give the Shrieker a “shriek” attack as a Rifle: +1 to hit, 3 damage, 10 range. And as a dagger (+1 to hit, 1 damage) up close. Fingers crossed! Good luck!
Chaax Kri, Kino, and the Shrieker rush each other from across the great hall.
Kino closes her eyes and utters a quick prayer, giving her the gift of premonition. (10, 4)
As they start to close the distance, the Shrieker suddenly stops digs its feet into the ground and swells up as it inhales deeply. It shudders and shakes as it screams. A practically visible sound wave shoots through the air toward Chaax. (7 + 1 - 3 = 5 vs 7 + 5 + 2 = 14) Fortunately Chaax Kri sees it coming in plenty of time to dodge out of the way!
The Shrieker actually starts to draw back as Chaax continues his charge. Kino releases David the Hawk pointing at the Shieker. “David, KILL!”
David will be a Str 3, +1 speed spear. (+1 to hit, 2 damage, 5 range.) I think it might be funny to see what happens when he can move 4 hexes, and then hurl himself up to 5 additional ones haha. Within melee, he will attack as a dagger.
The Shrieker digs in again, inflates like a balloon, and then vibrates furiously as it screams again at Chaax. (7 + 1 - 2 = 6 vs 8 + 5 + 2 = 15) Chaax slides under the torrent and pops back up to his feet and continues rushing undaunted. He is starting to close in on the Shrieker and will soon be within striking distance.
David screams, and flies across the hall, talons out, laser focused on the Shrieker. And Kino is running trying to get within range to fire her bow.
The Shrieker screams again. (10 + 3 - 1 = 12 vs 5 + 5 + 2 = 12) At close range, this time Chaax barely dodges out of the way. The sonic spear tears at his armor. It screams a second time as Chaax closes in, ready to pounce. (9 vs 16) Chaax leaps high, over the sound spear, his sword raised high up overhead, and swings it down at the Shrieker (8 vs 10) but overextends himself as the creature abruptly stops and changes direction. Chaax raises his sword in a defensive stance and blocks its retreat.
David screams and drops from the sky like a bullet (8 vs 10) but the Shrieker leaps over him.
Chaax swings (11 vs 13) as the Shieker lashes out with its claws (9 vs 10) and both warily circle each other.
Kino is almost within firing range David scratches at the monster (4 vs 11) as Chaax swings again (15 vs 12) and finally makes contact (Str 3 -> Str 1) laying the creature out.
Kino finally arrives, out of breath. She scowls at David, and at Chaax, who laughs haughtily.
It takes several trips to carry the 2,000 gold pieces back to the entrance of the crypt.
Victory points! Kino increases her Strength to 4.
THE END
Conclusion
You can really feel the difference between Strength levels. The homunculus was Str 5, equal to Chaax, but a lucky arrow quickly took it down to Str 3, evening the odds. Kino’s Str 3 (specifically her Speed of 3) kept her from participating meaningfully in the final fight, which she (and I) was pretty upset about. She didn’t even get to use her divination rolls!
Regardless, DERPS/TWERPS remains a perfectly cromulent game system for some quick and easy dungeon crawling.